Things I Never Say Out Loud


Since I’ve taken to expressing myself, here’s what’s been stuck inside me for too long.

I’ve always wondered why I can never seem to please people. They always have something to say, something to “correct.” It’s like running on a spot. Lately, I’ve realized there are only two ways to live this life:

You either let everyone shape you into what they want, or you take charge—and learn, mess up, and grow on your own terms.

Sometimes, I look at people I think I trust… and realize that I don’t. I wonder when I stopped trusting people.
Was it the moment I felt like I swallowed disappointment? Or the moment I smiled after?

It probably was.

There was a time when I truly believed I was the villain in my own story. I kept making choices that hurt me. I’d watch myself crash and laugh through it—like someone who didn’t care whether they made it out or not.

Sometimes, I watch people and wonder what kind of pain they carry. It’s usually the ones who don’t show emotions—the ones who seem broken in ways they don’t talk about. And I ask myself: Does experience really teach?

Maybe it just weighs you down. Maybe it doesn’t make you wiser—it just makes you quieter, heavier, slower to trust again. Honestly, maybe some people never learn. They just carry their pain like baggage no one offered to help with.

There’s so much more to say. I could go on and on, pour everything out like water. But everything ends eventually.

Even this.



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