Lies for Love

The policeman looked at me, unsure of what to say. I had been sitting there for almost an hour, lost for words. My little brother and his twin sister were right beside me. They were both playing this snake game on my button phone.

My Dad had just been murdered in the most gruesome way possible.

Craziest part? My mum was the one who drove the knife into his pot-bellied stomach.

That makes us two. Once, I had done the same with Juwon, my elder brother. And she had protected me.

A fortnight ago, everything was normal. Not until she used the knife she had once threatened him with.

"Miss Teni, you need to put your statement down," the man finally said again.

"Abi she's already deaf ni?" another policeman, who had no reason to be interfering, asked rudely. He was a light-skinned man with a few dark spots on his face.

How do you do it? How... Like how do you put down a statement against the mother who had birthed you? How do you deliberately write words that'll put your mum behind bars?

I needed to protect my mum. I needed to lie. I needed to let my Dad look bad. I needed to shut out the voice yelling the truth into my skull. My future, Kenny and Taiwo's future, this was the only way I could protect it. And Mum had done the same for me once. I should repay her. I should protect her like she did me. Shouldn't I?

Slowly, I picked the pen and wrote down an outright lie.

They had a heated argument.

My Dad had intended to stab my mum and unknowingly pointed it to himself. They realized a bit too late that the knife had made it successfully into the warmth of his stomach. My mum did try to save him but it was too late. And pointless too.

Lies. Every word was a lie.

The policeman took the paper from me, read it, and laughed.

"I knew it! That man nah woman beater. Nah God catch am!" He exclaimed, his fellow policemen laughing while making their own vile comments about my father.

I had let them. My statement had let them mock him.

But I knew I had to.

"I'd release your mum soon. She's just a victim," he said, patting me on the back.

After a few hours passed by and the twins had slept off in the waiting room, my mum came out, her hands still covered in her husband's dried blood.

She rushed towards me, thanking me and kissing my hair while hugging me closely to her, muttering incoherent words alongside.

I forced a smile. She was a murderer, still. We both were.

"Hmm. Abeg, carry Kehinde," she ordered me while taking Taiwo in her arms. I did without a word. We thanked the officers. My mum tipped them with the money she had kept with me, and they couldn't help but hurl more insults at my late Dad.

We left the police station, ordering a cab that took us home.

* * *

Home.

My dad's blood was still on the floor. The policemen took his body. Not like we had the luxury to afford a befitting burial for him.

The twins finally woke up and, after throwing a fit about being hungry, they drank garri and went off to their room.

Mum and I cleaned up, no words said to each other. After we were done cleaning, the silence still lingered. Not until it was around 8:00 pm in the evening, when she called me to boil rice for dinner before she finally spoke to me.

"Just two cups alone. I'm not eating." She finished, sitting on her bed, a jotter and pen in her hand.

"But ma," I was saying, but she cut me off.

"Teni, come back to my room after putting the rice on fire," she said, not looking up from whatever she was writing.

I didn't argue.

When I was back in her room, she started.

"You made the right decision o. If not, where will you and your younger ones be? You know your father doesn't have family. And mine, they're not ready to help anybody's child." She paused, looking at me, her palm on her lap.

She looked better and had properly washed off. She had a pink faded top on and a wrapper tied around her waist.

"But mummy why did you do it?" I asked, my voice low.

"Ah, is that even a question? He tried to kill me, Teni! Didn't you see how he held my neck? Is it until he kills me for you guys, ehn?" she asked.

She didn't feel guilty. She didn't feel an ounce of regret for murdering her husband. Just like I didn't when I murdered him (Juwon).

"But mummy..."

"No buts oo. Nothing like but from you. I did it for you and your siblings. If he kills me now, how will you guys survive, ehn? And you know he'll never take care of you like I would. Hm, be grateful he's dead and not injured." She stated, her full attention turned to me.

When had it all gone wrong? When had they fallen so out of love, up until the point where they'd wish each other dead without batting an eye?

"Pack your things oo, we can't stay here again before the neighbors would start saying the bad rumour they've been spreading around to our face. I'll pack for your younger ones. You just get yourself ready. Very early tomorrow, we'll leave. Oya go and do that now."

I didn't bother arguing with her. I sat down on my bed after exiting her room.

I closed my eyes, trying to think back to when it all went wrong.